so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
A bitchslap is in order.
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