Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
and you fell through a lawn chair
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
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