perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
When did angry sex become our thing?
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
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