My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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