Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
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