I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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