There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Randomize
