nut hugger
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
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