Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
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