I just pynch a tree in the face
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
