Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
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