so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
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