It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
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