Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
23 People Confess Why They Don’t Talk To Their Best Friend Anymore
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
These 17 Delivery Dudes Suck At Their Jobs But Are Winning At Life
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.