a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
