Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize