I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
Randomize
