all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
Randomize
