you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
