I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
Randomize
