On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
Randomize
