I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Randomize
