He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize