you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Randomize
