just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
