How'd it feel making her break her religion?
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
Randomize