sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
