This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
