that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
Randomize
