my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?