Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(414): View more from Wisconsin

you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...

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(414): you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened... http://tfl.nu/w2pr

Replies (22) Good night (6917) Bad night (801)
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(585): View more from New York

just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?

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(585): just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom? http://tfl.nu/qttt

Replies (56) Good night (1278) Bad night (4264)
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(951): View more from California

Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".

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(951): Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try". http://tfl.nu/107g

Replies (16) Good night (1026) Bad night (5851)
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(910): View more from North Carolina

i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.

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(910): i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny. http://tfl.nu/fz99

Replies (23) Good night (1463) Bad night (2958)
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(317): View more from Indiana

She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended

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(317): She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended http://tfl.nu/jhzt

Replies (14) Good night (1147) Bad night (3308)
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(256): View more from Alabama

hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by

(256): View more from Alabama

he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch

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(256): hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by (256): he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch http://tfl.nu/0lqj

Replies (13) Good night (2150) Bad night (832)
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(225): View more from Louisiana

We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl

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(225): We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl http://tfl.nu/f3ra

Replies (5) Good night (1011) Bad night (1456)
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(407): View more from Florida

There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.

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(407): There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese. http://tfl.nu/1bs2

Replies (6) Good night (1068) Bad night (717)
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(757): View more from Virginia

It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.

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(757): It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets. http://tfl.nu/9hch

Replies (17) Good night (675) Bad night (1305)
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(828): View more from North Carolina

While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee

(1-828): View more from North Carolina

You were drinking Everclear weren't you?

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(828): While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee (1-828): You were drinking Everclear weren't you? http://tfl.nu/a4qg

Replies (0) Good night (629) Bad night (370)
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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough

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(+44): He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough http://tfl.nu/6ovf

Replies (5) Good night (566) Bad night (578)
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(306): View more from Saskatchewan

Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right

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(306): Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right http://tfl.nu/4x80

Replies (0) Good night (466) Bad night (479)
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(847): View more from Illinois

Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.

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(847): Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction. http://tfl.nu/r2mw

Replies (2) Good night (595) Bad night (367)
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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.

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(+44): Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us. http://tfl.nu/xc1d

Replies (4) Good night (704) Bad night (203)
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(303): View more from Colorado

No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.

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(303): No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots. http://tfl.nu/n7ta

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