I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
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