This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
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