She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
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