i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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