I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Randomize
