I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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