I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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