Your favorite bartender is back from prision
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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