Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Randomize
