I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Randomize
