TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
He's on the porch naked. Help.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
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