So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
i am craving dick and cupcakes
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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