Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
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