i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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