Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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