I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
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