And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Randomize
