I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize
