I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Idk if I want to put a bra on
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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