There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
