I forgot how hot balto sounded
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
