would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
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